Tuesday, 2 August 2011

Slow News Day - Chelsea Preview

Afternoon all,

Today seems to be another day where all is quiet in the Goonerverse. There is very little speculation in the papers this morning aside from a few bits surrounding Mata and us being the favourites to sign the biggest cock to ever grace the premiership since its inception. I refuse to believe this is true and will no longer acknowledge any transfer news regarding the redneck looking, 70’s porn star moustache having cunt. Joey Barton. That’s the last time his name will be mentioned here unless hell freezes over.

Very strange and conflicting news circulating regarding Valencia’s Mata potentially joining us, but it being off and on again but much more expensive and then back off. Certainly bizarre news but if the papers are too believed then it’s not the news that will lift us out of our deep hole of self loathing surrounded by bad news of our best players leaving and shit defending.

Following on from yesterdays preview about Man United’s threat to the Arsenal this coming season I will shift my focus to Chelsea today that are in many ways far simpler to analyse.

Last season: As touched on yesterday Chelsea came out swinging. They raced to the top of the league and by November it seemed that they were invincible. They were clearly far from it. Some key injuries as well as a number of awful performances saw them slip so far away it is truly amazing that they managed to come second. It also highlights how shocking we were to allow them back into it.

Playing Squad: They have a great first XI and added Torres and Luiz in the winter window but have made no new additions so far this transfer window. So what can we expect of them? It is quite tricky to be honest. Villas-Boas has guaranteed an attractive playing style so this will certainly be a departure to the lump it tactics employed by “The Annoying One” (Mourhinio) and pretty much continued since. There were certainly more goals under Ancelotti but the style was not much better. This leads me nicely to their biggest problem; team selection. It all depends on who plays up front and the formation they play. Chelsea could just continue with a more of the same approach and easily contend for the league through sheer effectiveness of Drogba combining with “Fat Frank”.

If they are to change style do they have the right personnel to play the passing game or will they have to accommodate Torres into the team and play less direct? It is very interesting as they have had a winning formula that, for the most part has worked. The introduction of Torres seemed a genuine threat to Drogba at the time and would have been had it not been for erectile dysfunction he developed last season. Apparently he has taken a lot of Viagra and claims he will start banging them in this season. It is going to be interesting to see. I for one do not think the manager will radically change the style of play and judging from the pre-season friendlies he seems to prefer Drogba. I confess I know very little about the ins and outs at Chelsea and whether that is the case but that’s just how it seems on the outside. I personally am not inclined to find out about a club whose history started when they were taken over by a Russian.

Either way are they going to be more or less effective then last year as a unit? At the moment, probably not in my opinion. They haven’t got that one midfielder that can create magic in the middle and open a team up. This will hamper the team’s attempts to change direction and actually start playing football. This could easily change as I expect they could sign Modric in the near future. This will help the team play in that way but could well take the team time to get used to the style.

Threat to Arsenal: Very High. They in my opinion have a better team then Manchester United’s and as such will comfortably win a lot of games. I think they are not as good as a couple of seasons ago but that could well change if the blue pill kicks in and the Torres of old returns. He could cause some serious damage in full form seeing as he managed to do so playing for the Benefit Brigade.

Verdict: At the moment perhaps not any better off then last season but that’s not too comforting because, and I am assuming here, that they will not have another spell so awful with this set of players. If they add Modric or someone of that mould which I am sure they will they will have improved their biggest weakness which is not good for us.

Anyway I need to get a pint in before I play some football.

Till tomorrow Gooners.

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